DJ/Radio Producer-turned-Lawyer attempts to dress like a grown-up. Sometimes I comically fail. And I occasionally post fun stuff, like music videos, book-club reviews, or photos of beauty or oddity.
FYI: I was doing this entire blog from my Android phone, snatching moments out of my busy life for quick photos. But I hate auto-correct with a purple passion, so now I'm using the computer for most of the work. I am still using my phone for the photos, though. My photo sizes may be erratic, and the quality isn't stellar. I am not a professional blogger, and do not have time for lots of scenic poses with a great camera. I don't even own a great camera! However, I DO appreciate your continued feedback, even in the absence of photographic artistry.
I don't agree! He splits women in to two categories, and is very quick to dismiss one half for meeting conventional standards, and seems to think he has discovered something rare because he is attracted to nice intelligent people who aren't conventionally pretty. I think men and women alike are drawn to specific kinds of conventional beauty, but most people don't assume a "pretty person" is also going to be a an enchanting, interesting person. Pretty (or non-pretty) is a very personal measure. It's amazing how pretty a warm intelligent person who likes you becomes, and how quickly too. The author's definition of pretty is interesting. I think "conventionally pretty" or even "magazine-pretty" would have been more accurate. The non-pretty girls he describes sound exceptionally pretty to me.
Hmm..interesting article. I thnk that men fail to realize that women do not dress up for them. Most women dress up to impress or intimidate other women and some do it just because they love fashion.
I used to have a similar situation to this happen to me in my bar-going days. My best friend was/is gorgeous - me, I'm okay, when I make an effort I can look pretty good. But whenever I was with her, I felt like the moon and she was the sun. Guys never looked at me when she was around. I can't remember how many times the guy I'd been scoping out ignored me and went after her. *sigh*
Of course, time changes things. I became more confident...and I'm the one who's been married for 14 years (and she's on her 2nd marriage after going through about 30 guys in between). I remember when I realized that it wasn't neccesarily my appearance that guys were attracted to but...me! I went casual (jeans/t-shirt) to the bar one night. Just didn't feel like dressing up, you know? And the guys were all over me! It felt great.
Well, that was a little dash down memory lane...
I do think the author oversimplifies the situation, and it does only apply to a certain bracket of women (those who go to bars) and likely of a certain age (under 30). However, entertaining.
The part I found interesting was the part about how the "pretty" women may have looked different from each other before they got all dolled up, but the look they present to the public makes many of them look alike. They groomed away their easily perceivable uniqueness.
I see it as camoflage through fashion... conformity rather than self-expression. I think what he's talking about is the "hot girl uniform".
Come on, we have ALL seen the packs of Barbie Girls, Stepford Wives, etc. out and about. Like they were cast to complement each other in a commercial. I have never really been part of a pack like that... usually someone seeing me with my friends, I imagine, might even wonder... "how do these people even know each other?"
Another issue that brought up some memories is "hot girl" vs. "Cute/plain girl". The girl with the "hot-girl uniform" clothing and grooming would get tons of guys fawning all over. I, as the "cute/plain" girl got some attention... but it wasn't quite the same. I never minded, but it was odd to see.
Probably the thing that distills the dichotomy for me is: I was at a party in college, and crashed out on a couch. The next morning, a guy looks at me in genuine surprise and said "you're STILL pretty!"
I may not have been the "hot girl" at the party, but I was the pretty one in the morning! Haha!
I don't agree! He splits women in to two categories, and is very quick to dismiss one half for meeting conventional standards, and seems to think he has discovered something rare because he is attracted to nice intelligent people who aren't conventionally pretty. I think men and women alike are drawn to specific kinds of conventional beauty, but most people don't assume a "pretty person" is also going to be a an enchanting, interesting person. Pretty (or non-pretty) is a very personal measure. It's amazing how pretty a warm intelligent person who likes you becomes, and how quickly too. The author's definition of pretty is interesting. I think "conventionally pretty" or even "magazine-pretty" would have been more accurate. The non-pretty girls he describes sound exceptionally pretty to me.
ReplyDeleteIncidentally - love your jarmies!
Men are clueless...
ReplyDeleteHmm..interesting article. I thnk that men fail to realize that women do not dress up for them. Most women dress up to impress or intimidate other women and some do it just because they love fashion.
ReplyDeleteI used to have a similar situation to this happen to me in my bar-going days. My best friend was/is gorgeous - me, I'm okay, when I make an effort I can look pretty good. But whenever I was with her, I felt like the moon and she was the sun. Guys never looked at me when she was around. I can't remember how many times the guy I'd been scoping out ignored me and went after her. *sigh*
ReplyDeleteOf course, time changes things. I became more confident...and I'm the one who's been married for 14 years (and she's on her 2nd marriage after going through about 30 guys in between). I remember when I realized that it wasn't neccesarily my appearance that guys were attracted to but...me! I went casual (jeans/t-shirt) to the bar one night. Just didn't feel like dressing up, you know? And the guys were all over me! It felt great.
Well, that was a little dash down memory lane...
I do think the author oversimplifies the situation, and it does only apply to a certain bracket of women (those who go to bars) and likely of a certain age (under 30). However, entertaining.
What's he really saying? That guys like "real" women, however that guy defines it.
ReplyDeleteThe part I found interesting was the part about how the "pretty" women may have looked different from each other before they got all dolled up, but the look they present to the public makes many of them look alike. They groomed away their easily perceivable uniqueness.
ReplyDeleteI see it as camoflage through fashion... conformity rather than self-expression. I think what he's talking about is the "hot girl uniform".
Come on, we have ALL seen the packs of Barbie Girls, Stepford Wives, etc. out and about. Like they were cast to complement each other in a commercial. I have never really been part of a pack like that... usually someone seeing me with my friends, I imagine, might even wonder... "how do these people even know each other?"
Another issue that brought up some memories is "hot girl" vs. "Cute/plain girl". The girl with the "hot-girl uniform" clothing and grooming would get tons of guys fawning all over. I, as the "cute/plain" girl got some attention... but it wasn't quite the same. I never minded, but it was odd to see.
Probably the thing that distills the dichotomy for me is: I was at a party in college, and crashed out on a couch. The next morning, a guy looks at me in genuine surprise and said "you're STILL pretty!"
I may not have been the "hot girl" at the party, but I was the pretty one in the morning! Haha!