and their names will be "Ben" and "Jerry"...
Much to the disappointment of the in-laws, that's just the result of eating too much "ethical business practices" ice cream. No babies. Of course, now I'd be afraid to get pregnant, as I might get drafted to be the recession version of a parade float!
Why am I posting this Gawd-awful photo?
First, I decided right at the start to be honest with my pics. No dressing up just for the blog, no major photoshop changes, no taking five zillion photos to get one flattering one. Besides, I'm usually short on time, and just get someone to use my phone camera because I always forget my real one.
Second, seeing this pic was a bit of a shock for me. I'm hoping that it will spur me into much-needed diet and exercise changes. Don't worry, I have no intention of morphing this into a weight-loss blog. What is more boring that hearing about someone's diet?
Context for above and below photos: Saturday night, I decided to take Stinky to the mall for a 3-D movie. Hubby said I looked cute. I believe his exact words were "Hot Mom". LIAR!!!
By the time Stinky and I got home, after a lovely evening with movie, ice cream, and a trip to the bookstore, Hubby was out with a friend. So I got Stinky to take my photos. I never got around to posting Saturday's photos last night due to shell-shock.
I love the sequins around the neckline of this top, but hadn't worn it for awhile. I had no idea it looked this bad on me now! The twisted part is that I felt cute! As I've said before, having a belly is very new for me, so I'm still adjusting my inner picture of what I look like.
Ew! How on Earth does a girl with a teeny waist get a muffin top? *shudder, sob* I remember when this shirt was a little big on me.
Top: New York and Co.
Jeans: Lane Bryant
Earrings: Lia Sophia
Shoes: Bass
Earlier in the day was fun playing with my favorite toy: my kayak!
A couple months ago, I was seduced by the Dark Side : I purchased capris. I hate capris... I'm perfectly willing to pay for the extra foot of fabric. But this summer was stinking hot, so I occasionally subject the innocent to the lumpy, veiny mess claiming to be calves. I sure hope the unfortunate viewers don't turn to stone.
The top is loose and cool. And looks exactly like the ones my mother makes for herself. The sleeves come gathered with elastic, but it was too tight for all the muscles (OK, OK, so they're buried under my "bingo wings") so I removed the elastic.
I wear Crocs for kayaking because there are often sharp stones I'd like to protect my tender tootsies from. I don't wear them as actual shoes, unlike many folks I see polluting my visual field with them.
OK, I'm not being entirely honest.... When my feet are absolutely killing me, I wear them as shoes. I hang my head in shame.
Top: Lane Bryant
Capris: Fashion Bug
Visor: WalMart
Sunglasses: random store
DJ/Radio Producer-turned-Lawyer attempts to dress like a grown-up. Sometimes I comically fail. And I occasionally post fun stuff, like music videos, book-club reviews, or photos of beauty or oddity.
Hah, that was hilarious!
ReplyDeleteI think the black top with the sequin neck can be saved. You just have to wear something that has a very high waist under it so you don't get that - *imagine a sound effect here* "bump-bump" of belting where you have chub. Sometimes I do this with a skirt that's meant to go mid-shin, but I hike the waistband up to just beneath the bra so it hangs flat, the top looks flat over it, and the skirt winds up around knee length.
I actually quite like the patterned top. It WOULD look cute on mom!